While schools, businesses, and synagogues have been closed and will remain closed while we try to get everything under control, we’ve learned to adapt. Many Jewish institutions have created virtual ways of connecting with their members. Some synagogues have moved to hosting services, adult education, and even funerals and shiva minyanim over Zoom and live streaming their services to Facebook. Synagogues have more active social media presences. Jewish Summer camps, many of which have decided to close their gates this summer, are hosting hangouts, Kabbalat Shabbat services, story times, trivia games, and more for their campers and their families.
These experiences have been met with a lot of positive feedback, but also some criticism. Virtual services and educational opportunities can be very beneficial. More people can attend services! People who are not able to physically leave their homes can attend and pray with fellow congregants. Depending on the siddur a congregation uses, they can be shared on the screen for people to follow along and allows more accessibility to materials. Virtual services also allow for you to welcome new rituals into your home practice. Personally, before we started virtual services, my family hadn’t lit Shabbat candles at home in years. It felt so amazing to start integrating that into our practice at home, and made the connection to Judaism stronger for me. Virtual services allow you to connect to your temple friends so that you don’t go absolutely crazy during this time. One more pro – how awesome is it that you can wear sweatpants to services? No one has to see what you’re wearing as pants over Zoom!
Now, the whole online experience isn’t sunshine and rainbows. While virtual synagogues can make services and learning more accessible for some, it can actually cut out people too. Not everyone has a device that allows them to connect to Zoom and not everyone is comfortable with having a Facebook. While platforms like Zoom allow you to tune in over the phone, it can be hard to tell when it’s your turn to talk, you don’t get to physically see the other people joining the meeting, and you can’t easily mute and unmute yourself over the dial-in option. That makes you feel very disconnected. Virtual services can also be less meaningful for some. The space we are in can influence what we feel while we pray, and some people need the space of a sanctuary or a certain length of service containing certain prayers for it to feel meaningful. It’s okay if a service doesn’t feel right to you, you can add more to your practice that will make it more meaningful if your congregation doesn’t offer something that fulfills you. The beautiful thing about the internet is that we have access to so many different places and experiences. The mourning process can also be extremely difficult at this time. Judaism’s mourning rituals allow for a lot of closure and events like funerals and shiva minyanim are being changed, so the mourning process is changing. It is a very difficult time to go through a death in the family, but our community is stronger than ever and we are checking in on one another and supporting each other the best we can.
This takes some time to get used to, our new normal definitely doesn’t feel so “normal”. Instead of being overly critical, try to go into this with an open mind, you might actually enjoy yourself. While we may not be doing our usual things in our usual spaces, the main point is that we’re still doing it! The world has not stopped turning.
Charles Darwin taught us that only the strong survive and that you need to adapt to survive. Well, my friends, we are adapting. If we don’t adapt, we don’t survive, point-blank. If we didn’t have these new virtual ways to go about our daily lives, where would we be? We’d either be conducting our lives, business as usual, and putting ourselves and our loved ones in danger or we’d all be cooped up in our homes without any sense of our normal lives and our mental healths will quickly deteriorate.
That being said, it’s okay to have some constructive criticism. Just make sure that it’s actually constructive. However, do not, under any circumstances, be a negative Nancy. Don’t just complain, complain, complain. No one likes that, and no one wants that. At after school this year, I taught my kids about grumpy gills and pouty pants. These are two terms near and dear to my heart and the kids really like them too. We learned that sometimes things don’t always turn out how we wanted them to (like sometimes when we play games and we get “out”), but we can’t just whine about it or get wicked angry and yell and complain. That won’t solve our problems. Instead, look on the bright side. Don’t focus on the things you don’t like, focus on what you do like.
We want to hear from you! How is virtual Jewish engagement influencing your practice? Are you having a positive experience? A negative one? Let’s discuss!
Love and Virtual Hugs,
Amanda & Marissa
